Old Dude Arrested For Trying To Bang A Horse

So heres the deal, a 68 year old dude from Pennsylvania traveled across America to…?

A. sightsee

B. visit relatives

C. fuck a fucking horse

D. none of the above

As much as we all wish the answer is A, B, or even D, it’s obviously C.

“Michael Crawford, 68, was booked into a Maricopa County jail and later released on a felony bestiality charge. He was arrested after meeting with the undercover deputies in the Phoenix area, said sheriff’s Deputy Joaquin Enriquez.

He was taken into custody after he confirmed his sexual intentions to the undercover officers, who came to the meeting with two horses in a trailer, Enriquez said. Crawford did not have sex with either of the animals, the deputy added.”

“If you can really help with what I am seeking, I am definitely interested in traveling out to meet you,” he told the detectives, adding he had purchased a non-refundable ticket to Phoenix, according to police.

Crawford told detectives he had traveled the country since the 1970s to find horse owners willing to let him have sex with the animals, Enriquez said.”

Wow, gotta love the commitment this young stud has. I prefer to set my radius to around 15 miles (20’s when I’m desperate) but this shits (horse shits) on that. Arizona?! I’m guessing this guys never been to Djais on a Thursday night. Listen theres very few things I’d travel that far for, I’d go to Arizona if there was a Chick Fil A open on Sunday and that’s pretty much it. This guy meant serious business, definitely wasn’t horsing around. Can only imagine this sicko in the Polo section at Macys, must act like Bill Cosby in a CVS. I could go on and on about this, but I don’t want to beat a dead horse, hay now!

PS. This guys picture is amazing, you can tell exactly what he was thinking during this photo and it was “fuck my life I just got caught trying to fuck a horse”.

082714-Michael-Crawfordurl-1

You can check out the full article right here:

http://www.philly.com/philly/news/20150713_Reuters_L2N0ZT2AS_Pennsylvania_man_arrested_in_Arizona_on_suspicion_of_bestiality.html?c=r

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