DMX Allegedly Robs Dude in Newark

Ok so here’s the gist…DMX and his posse were at an Exxon station in Newark late Saturday night (technically Sunday morning) when some 21 year old dude recognized him and approached him and started shooting the shit about rap with him. Then things took an interesting turn as someone in DMX’s clique pulled a gun on the guy and demanded his mula. According to an article from,

“As the victim removed $3,200 from his pocket, DMX “snatched the money out of his hand,” the man told investigators.

The rapper, born Earl Simmons, then jumped into one of four black Cadillac Escalades that sped from the scene, according to police.

The victim followed the motorcade south on McCarter Highway and was able to make out one of the SUV’s license plates, which he turned over to investigators. Police did not say whether they had connected the tag to DMX or anyone in his entourage.”

OK there’s a few things that stand out here. FIRST, I don’t want to make fun of this guy who just got robbed because clearly he is mentally impaired, but what kind of person just goes up to DMX and starts talking about rap? In NEWARK nonetheless. If I was in Newark and i saw the guy who made ‘Where the Hood At?’ I’m getting the fuck in my Rav 4 and straight up speeding THE FUCK out of there. Not even putting on my seatbelt or anything just putting the car in drive and hitting the gas like I’m fucking Vin Diesel. THEN I’m praying to Adonai my Jewish lord and savior and promising him I’ll never take soda from Chipotle instead of water ever again and all that kind of stuff. AND THEN, I’m calling my divorced parents on a 3-way call and telling them how much I love them and miss them and giving them instructions about who to give my belongings to in case I don’t make it. Going up to him and talking to him?! Kid has some serious kahunas (or he just listened to too much DMX growing up and is now brain dead). BUT WAIT, not only does he initiate conversation with him, after a dude PULLS A FUCKING GUN ON HIM AND DEMANDS HIS MONEY he then FOLLOWS THEM TO GET A LICENSE PLATE #. I’m fucking sure. Like I said, going up to the man in the first place was a no-no. But you know what? I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt because there are plenty of times my drunk ass has talked to people I shouldn’t have talked to. Random homeless guys, bouncers, crack head prostitutes…I’ve had my fair share of stupid encounters. But once a gun is pulled on you then you just gotta cut your losses and give up. $3,200 is a nice piece of change but it’s definitely not worth chasing after DMX and his goons for, no fucking way. Also, just wondering, what kind of 21 year old has $3,200 in cash on them…….in Newark…..Ah I know, homie definitely called the upset and had Wisconsin over Kentucky and just won a shit ton of money, why else would he have that kind of cash right!? And Finally, you just gotta respect the way DMX and his henchmen ride the fuck out after robbing some random 21 year old. Just snatches the cash and hops into one of the four black escalades and peaces the fuck out. Awesome. Just like how they do it in the music videos (or the low budget-straight to DVD- gangsta movies that have rappers starring in them which makes too much sense since we’re talking about a guy who specializes in low budget- straight to DVD- gangsta movies). I mean coming from DMX this kind of execution shouldn’t really come as a surprise, the man starred in ‘Belly’, which for all the clueless white readers is pretty much held in the same regard as ‘Scarface’ in the hip hop community.

But wait, how do we know this was actually DMX? Well, nothing has been confirmed yet, but according to his schedule he was in Newark Saturday night for a show. We’ll continue to monitor the situation and provide updates as we get them. You can check out the original story right here:


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